Saturday, October 3, 2015

Crossroads

Since I started my journey towards fitness I've consistently had two or three fitness goals in mind.  As I've accomplished one goal, I've added a new one.  At the same time, I have been enrolled in graduate classes to earn my degree (CAGS) so I can become a school administrator.


Two weeks ago, I accomplished my goal of doing the Ride to Remember, my first Century bike ride from Springfield to Boston.  In two weeks I finish my coursework for my CAGS. I only have to complete my field experience, do my portfolio and write my journal. (Sounds like a lot, but I write this blog, so it's not that big of a deal.)


The faces of Rugged!  Picture on the left was taken in 2014.  Picture on the right was taken this year.  Look at my face!!!  That's how I'm feeling right now.
Today I am at a crossroads. What's next? What do I do? What goal do I set? For me, having a goal helps keep my motivation high.  So this crossroads is a challenge for me.


Make me known your ways, O LORD: Teach me Your paths.  Lead me in Your truth and teach me, for You I wait all the day.
Psalm 25:4-5
I battle with anxiety, which can be both good and bad. The good part is that it propels me to make things happen. I rarely sit back, a victim of my circumstances.  If I want something, I make it happen.  If I want it badly enough, I move heaven and earth for it.  The bad part is that I can be somewhat obsessive and sleep evades me.  Standing at a crossroads like this increases my anxiety like you can't imagine.

"Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself.  Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."
Matthew 6:25-34 ESV

Rugged Maniac allows you access to these pictures for free!
Last week we did the Rugged Maniac. Since I don't run, I was afraid I would be a wimp when I did it, so I did some running on the treadmill at the gym last week. I can't say I liked it, but I didn't hate it. Running made me sweat - a LOT, which I really liked.  So this week, I ran on the treadmill for 14 minutes.  Fourteen minutes.  That's nothing.  But for two days, my left knee hurt. (That's my bad knee.) I was really hoping I could pretend that my arthritis is just a figment of my imagination, that Dmitriy really did make my knee all better and that I could run, despite the doctor's strict orders to not run.  Yesterday it hurt a lot. Running is off the table.

Now what?

But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.
James 1:5

My gym doesn't have a pool, so no swimming.

It's cold now and I don't have any cold gear yet to ride my bike in the cooler temps.

I don't really feel lost.  But the lack of direction... The lack of knowing what's next... It's an uncomfortable feeling.  

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6

Part of me wants to just be.  But it scares me to think that "just being" will make me lazy.  I am grateful for the faith I have in the Lord...that I can turn to Him for both comfort and direction.

Do not worry.  Learn to pray about everything.  Give thanks to God as you ask Him for what you need.  The peace of God is much greater than the human mind can understand.  This peace will keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7  NLV

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Questions for you:
What fun things do you have planned for this weekend?
What do you do when you're not sure what to do?
Answer in the comments below.