What a week+ it's been since I last wrote. The rundown...
This morning, my dear Uncle Russell passed away after a brave fight with colon cancer. He was diagnosed in November, so it feels like it came out of no where. We are very sad as we mourn his passing.
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
Psalm 34:18
With the loss of my uncle, my heart is very heavy and none of what I have to share seems worth even mentioning. Yet I committed to keeping up the blog on my journey, so let me fill you in on the whirlwind since the last time I shared with you.
Happy New Year meant back to work and immediate high level stress. So much so that the things I typically do to help work through it simply weren't working.
I turned 50 in September, so last week I had my initial colonoscopy screening. Less than fun. (All clear though.)
This is what I stocked up on for my pre-colonoscopy diet. Ended up just drinking water and sipping broth and apple juice, but...stay tuned.
My husband retired after 32 years on the Springfield Police Department. I love him so!
Got a haircut with a slightly new and shorter style.
Finally celebrated my son's birthday with him. He moved to the eastern part of the state last March, so we don't get to see him as often. It was a month late, but we got to see him and I got to love on him.
I don't have a picture from this 25th Birthday celebration, but here's one from four years ago.
I developed a stomach virus that kept me home from work for two days.
AND I had to have a root canal for an infected tooth that was causing me a lot of pain. On the SAME day as I was fighting the stomach bug. The SAME day.
Let's just say that I haven't been up to writing. Yet, despite the many detours that have been sent my way, I still remain focused on renewing my commitment to wellness - physical, emotional, spiritual. Sometimes that means accepting the grace that comes when you can't measure up to your expectations and demands that you place on yourself. When you can't do more, Keeping it simple IS more.
I've been so sick that I haven't been able to eat solid foods at all. And getting to the gym is on the back burner until I feel strong enough to just walk.. Thank God for my colonoscopy stash (pictured above), because I've been living on the Powerade, jellos, soup and smoothies. To get in calories, I've even been eating ice cream. As of yesterday, I'd lost 8 lbs. SINCE my colonoscopy. Not sure how that will hold up once I start actually eating again. Right now, I'm depleted and dehydrated, so my even my muscles are suffering.
I'll get back to it soon!
I recently discovered the Abide app. Abide is a Christian medition app that leads you through different meditations. I don't pay for the subscription to the app because they aren't exactly what I need from meditation. That said, I do receive a daily meditation that I can listen to online. It's a 2-3 minute reflection and prayer to start my day off. This has kept me going through the ups and downs of the past week.
As I finish this week's blog, be reminded that sometimes life just hits you. Through it all, keep your focus on what is important. Family. Love. Health. I saw this today on Facebook and I had to share it. I don't want to live in a world where love is invisible. I want to BE the change, BE the light.
In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.
One of my goals for 2020 is to de-stress. While I'm not sure about how exactly one measures the stress or lack thereof in their life, I do have a relatively solid plan. Or at least I think it's solid.
First, let's talk about the soul to cell connection, wherein your mind and body are connected at a cellular level.
It's Science
Believe it or not, there is a science to it this connection (*sources below). I will try to keep it basic.
Everyone produces a hormone called "Cortisol" which is best known as the stress hormone. It is crucial to many body systems, including mood, sleep, blood pressure and blood sugar regulation, as well as your body's use of macro-nutrients (protein, fat and carbs). When your body is on high alert, cortisol may shut down functions that may interfere, such as digestive, reproductive and immune systems. Have you ever noticed that when you are stressed you are more likely to get sick, gain weight, and even have out of wack periods?
Too much cortisol wrecks havoc on us. Prolonged stress causes your cortisol levels to be unmanageable, interfering with your body's ability to function. Scientists have found that too much stress causes damage to our telomeres, the protective casing at the end of DNA strands. This impairs the body's ability to fight infection and disease. Further studies have shown that the effect of stress on our DNA can actually be passed onto future generations. Let me repeat that. Stress affects our DNA, which can be genetically passed onto our unborn children. It's passed onto our children...AND even our grandchildren.
So What To Do About It?
Learning how to handle and deal with stress is probably one of the most daunting things I have had to personally address. To say that I have it figured out would be a lie. I am on a journey to addressing it, and I hope to share with you some of the things that have benefited me.
Exercise
If you've been following me, you would be surprised if I didn't say "Exercise helps to reduce stress." Exercise helps your body to feel better. It also reduces fatigue, as well as improves mental acuity. Exercise helps your body to produce endorphins, which improves your ability to sleep and manage stress. That said, knowing it helps doesn't necessarily mean you will do it.
So, if you don't exercise regularly, start. Start small and easy. Start by walking. Yes, walking. Don't count the walking you do at your job as your exercise. That's work. Take a walk in the neighborhood, or try 30 minutes on a treadmill. If 30 minutes seems too long, try 10 minutes three times per day. It's still 30 minutes. Try yoga. I swear by yoga. I really relaxes me and is good for your joints. (Yoga With Adriene was recommended to me. She has a variety of yoga options to try.)
It's been a long time since I took a locker room selfie!
Be careful! The addage less is more and more is less is true here. If you overdo cardio, especially at first, you will not see the results you want. Not only do you run the risk of burning out and not exercising at all, but too much aerobic exercise at one time causes an increase in your production of cortisol (the stress hormone we are trying to reduce).
Meditation
Yep, I said it. The "M" word. Meditation is definitely the new buzz word all about town. Doctors, therapists and personal trainers tell you to do it. What is it and why all the fuss about it?
In short, meditation is a practice of centering your mind and eliminating the distractions from your mind. Typically, meditation focuses on your breath. We spend our lives running around, focusing on every detail. Constantly inundated with one thing after another, our brains are forced to make sense of the chaos. Meditation helps to quiet your mind.
When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul.
Psalm 94:19
When I first started meditation, it was at the encouragement of my doctor because I was not sleeping. I could fall asleep, but I couldn't stay asleep. I was waking up at 2:00 a.m., unable to turn the wheels of my brain off. In addition to cleaning up my sleep habits (e.g.: going to bed at the same time every night, not looking at the clock when I wake up), he recommended a couple of different sleep apps.
These are the ones I tried:
Meditation Studio is a skill you can enable in Amazon's Alexa. There are two different sleep meditations that I found helpful to fall asleep at bedtime, but too disruptive to fall back to sleep at 2:000 a.m.
Sleep Sounds is another skill you can enable in Amazon Alexa. That was useful in both falling asleep and falling back to sleep. There's no talking with this one, so it was really only the calming sound that lulls you to sleep.
Calm is a meditation app that is available for a free trial. It provides a unique 10-minute meditation every day, It also has sleep stories you can listen to, in order to lull yourself to sleep. It's very relaxing, but I wasn't keen on spending money on it after the trial ended.
Relax Melodies was the winner. You can download this app and use several features for free, with a pay option to add more to your experience. At first, we used it as an enhancement from the Sleep Sounds from Alexa. It is available wherever your phone is (meaning even when you travel). After using the app for a while and actually preferring it over the Sleep Sounds, I discovered there are Meditations, Sleep Stories and "Sleep Moves" included as well. I tried the meditations included with the free portion of the app and fell in love. Because my biggest problem with sleep was waking in the middle of the night, I simply moved to the couch, played the meditation and fell back to sleep. It was magic. Just about every time. I started using the meditations when I went to bed and found my sleep was interrupted less frequently. I was actually sleeping until 4 or 5 a.m. without having to get up. Once my brain adjusted to the free meditations, I realized I was worth the $5 per month cost of using the full app.
"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
Matthew 11:28 - 30
My princess and sleep companion (until Brian goes to bed)
Meditation is more than just for sleep
My new job brought high levels of stress. I learn new things every day. I am on my feet all day, working longer hours than ever before. I am mentally fatigued beyond comparison. I am totally out of my comfort zone. I am mentally and physically exhausted. Every day.
I love to workout, but I am finding on my way home from work, my body shuts down. By the time I drive to the gym, I want to collapse. I have no energy to function. I just keep driving. Home. Where I crash.
I lost the endorphin rush of working out. I wasn't benefiting from the one thing I knew helped me cope. I tried working out early in the morning once - twice per week. That worked until it got cold out. It's awfully hard to get out of bed in the morning and get to the gym. But I do my best to make sure I get in at least 4 workouts per week.
That said, one day I was driving to work and I felt completely overwhelmed. I realized that the practice I used for helping me to sleep could be used to help me deal with the stress of work. But obviously, I couldn't close my eyes and focus on my breathing while I was driving. So I began my own practice of meditation. This time, I turned it into a time of worship and prayer, with a closing of quiet meditation. No prescription, no external voice telling me to breathe, just time with my Lord.
"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."
Joshua 1:9
I play these two songs: Lord I Need You by Matt Maher and Tremble by Mosaic, followed by listening to Psalms read to me on my Bible app. After listening to a couple of chapters, I simply pray, quietly to the Lord. Jesus, Jesus, You make the darkness tremble. Jesus, Jesus, You silence fear. Be with me today, Lord. Help me to be more like you.
Bible app by YouVersion
Meditation is a practice. You never really perfect it. But it only works if you practice it. We can't change our circumstances, but we can control our response to it. By practicing mediation, I have seen first hand the effect it has on helping me address both sleeplessness AND manage stress. I am, by no means there. I still need to "figure it out."
As I do, I will share with you what I learn. The good, the bad, and the ugly. For this year, I am focusing on the whole picture. Not just diet and exercise, but also trying to address the cell to soul connection.
New book I'm starting: One Breath at a Time: A Skeptic's Guide to Christian Meditation by J. Dana Trent
"Let my meditation be pleasing to Him; As for me, I shall be glad in the Lord."
